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This book delves into the experiences of individuals in BDSM communities. While misunderstandings
surrounding these communities prevail, BDSM sexuality cuts across race, gender, nationality,
and sexual orientation. BDSM describes forms of sexuality that incorporate restraint,
pressure, sensation, training, and elements of both erotic and non-erotic power exchange
between the engaged parties. Some BDSM 'scenes' include roleplaying, spanking, blindfolds,
ropes, and erotic costuming. This book is designed as a guide for BDSM community members
who must wade through the quagmire of unique problems they face: coming out to family,
friends and partners; distinguishing abusive relationships from healthy consensual
ones; finding and developing community; overcoming shame and denial; exploring whether
BDSM sexuality can be a healing tool; gaining access to quality, culturally competent
psychotherapy; and finding strategies to develop a healthy sexual self-esteem in the
face of current medical and social standards that view them as sick or pathological.
The book also serves as an educational primer for those whose partners, friends, and
family members are involved in BDSM. In terms of challenges faced by BDSM communities,
the most significant is living with a stigmatized sexuality shame, prejudice, discrimination,
isolation, depression, and a lack of adequate, competent mental health care. Issues
such as coming out as a sexual minority, finding community and partners, and dealing
with scenes and relationships that go wrong are some the common experiences shared
by members of BDSM communities. Sexual Outsiders employs common sense, good humor,
and vivid anecdotes while incorporating basic ideas about human behavior, psychology,
philosophy, interviews, history, and clinical case studies to illustrate the real
lives and experiences of men and women in BDSM communities. Anyone wanting to learn
more about this unique, and more-common-than-you-think expression of sexuality, will
find in these pages insight into the various challenges BDSM practitioners face, and
the many strengths that people in the BDSM communities have developed in the face
of social stigma and prejudice.
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